Enlighten Me Free

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Out of the insanity

yes, there is a wonderful life after RSE (only went to a beginner's retreat and listened to the CD's for a year but had the white book for 16 years). I had to totally not engaged in anything at all that was from any spritual teachings - i have been interested in metaphysics for 30 years, first reading Edgar Cayce and everything I could get my hands on from there onwards) - I still dont know what to believe in but for now I believe in myself and that kindness and compassion is the start of my journey back to myself.

I recently got a great job teaching children full time and still do my part time job - money is flowing in abundantly and i feel at peace and happy with who i am - none of my money nor time goes to any new age or spiritual organisation any more. I feel a wonderful future ahead of me and it has nothing to do with anything outside of myself nor anything at all from RSE. I am just listneing to who I am - I really do feel the way out of this insanity is to let go of all your beliefs - absolutely everything - you may feel lost but that is the only way - it was the way I found myself back - nature has been my anchor - my animals, the ocean, the children i teach - and the few friends that i have.

I now question everything and feel i have gained wisdom from all this - most of all i don't feel the fear that i have had all my life - I am on a new journey now, one that i don't know about but i stay calm and live one day at a time - that is all we have.

Re: Out of the insanity

MOWithin said, "I am on a new journey now, one that i don't know about but i stay calm and live one day at a time - that is all we have."

SMILE !
In reading your post, I can hear myself and others when we were out of RSE. The strange irony, I think, is that eastern mysticism (and similar) teachings tell us to go within. TO ME, that means have a direct/personal relationship with God (whatever that means to one). Yet, we have all come to similar conclusions. In your words, I hear you saying (correct me if I'm wrong), that YOU are now back in touch with your self - what you think/feel/want/need, and your own JOY of LIVING LIFE to your fullest. Isn't that what it was always supposed to be ? We got sidetracked, thinking we needed Someone Bigger than us, OUTSIDE of us, to guide us where we didn't know where to go to. That was mistaken, as we now know.

A woman who lives in Yelm (I do not; never did), and has position to see many RSE students said to me, when I told her I would not be back, "I've seen many people come here and in 2- 3 years, they don't come back anymore. I don't care what JZ does, I don't believe Ramtha is real ! She's taking people's money. All I know for myself, is that I live my life to be a good person, be happy and healthy, and that's what matters."

All of that wisdom from a woman who never attended RSE. That was very humbling for me, because I felt sorry for her spiritual ignorance. It was ME that was ignorant. Now I think of her and smile.

You mentioned not feeling the fear anymore. I understand. It amazes me that we're all so different as we walk in our own shoes through life - yet - we are all the same.

Free. Just feeling FREE. I don't think I've shared this story before. One day, when I was out of school less than a year but KNEW I wasn't going back, I had a lightbulb go off. I was driving the kids somewhere, and thinking about how I had passed through the stormy sea of emotional pain when I realized that RSE was a scam. As I drove, I was reflecting upon that past, having shed many months of tears, and enjoying my new found happiness and peace. I had mentioned to David for months, "We need to build a website and share our experiences with others. We just cannot be alone in all of this!" Thinking about the future website, and what it all represented...the words came to me as I was driving, "Enlighten Me FREE". Not money/free. The enlightenment is to BE free. On all levels; mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and physically...out of RSE and free to be ME. It may seem obvious to an outsider, but to me, it was an emotionally felt discharge of my past. For the first time, I was feeling like my old self again...happy...content...and free of having tethers put upon me by RSE "rules" and "regs" in order to evolve. Don't need any of those LIMITATIONS !!!!!

Keep on Marching, MOW !!!!! You're an inspiration.

Re: Out of the insanity

I couldn't agree with the both of you more!
Someone from this forum sent me one of the most beautiful and inspiring e-mails
that really made an impact on me to
be able to move on.

they said:"there is no question that it is a slippery slope in the beginning, brutal is a term that fits."

Once I came to grips with the "brutal" part ( and that seemed to have taken these first five months), things seemed to have taken
a more gentler turn.
This forum helps immensely, having ALOT
of alone time has helped, other web sites,
books and former friends have helped-all
have been integral parts in this healing.
I am so thankful for David and whatchmacallit for having the fortitude
to get this up and running.
Without the help of the internet and former members, I think
this would be an extraordinary long haul.
Thank you all for sharing your thoughts on
here. You never know what kind of an impact
just a few sentences have on someone!

Re: Out of the insanity

Yes, thank you David and Whatcha, this website, when I found it told me I was not insane and on track with what I was feeling even though most of the other people I met on the retreat didn't agree with me - perhpas one or two did - the great thing was my partner at the retreat also saw through the scam several months later - We are all now free.

Being free and out of any kind of "group" is wonderful - and the strange thing is all my life I had never gone for anything connected with a group - RSE is sneaky as they have hooks to get people to join them - they pick some "truths" and make the rest up - at the retreat I couldn't understand why everyone loved it so much - I found it boring - to me it was all material I had heard in the CD's and had read in other books - nothing was new - they do trick people into thinking something new will be revealed but it isn't - a scam is all it is -

Anyway, thank you for this post - I am busy these days but from time to time I do stop by to listen to what others have to say - times are peaceful these days, and I really do believe it is because the fear is gone - there is nothing to fear at all - just to enjoy what this wonderful earth has to offer and be kind of others and live a truthful life - yes, there certainly is a wonderful, peaceful, joyous and abundant life after RSE.