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OK, this may take a while. Ive got time.
First let me say that in regards to the tank, ONCE was enough. AND I learned alot, thank you.I was up for it, looking forward to it, your experience vs. philosophy and all that. I'm a kinesetic hands-on kind of gal.
It was only 5 hours, Id heard the tales, days on end, no food, heck I read Ambers book I kind-of know what Im in for.
Its a dicipline THATS for sure.
A friend of mine had her leg crushed, like go-to-the-hospital crushed in there (she told me the story AFTER I went thru the "experience")
So here we go, taped and ready, scared but not too bad, Im a photographer so Ive spent LOTS of time in the dark, no problem. Get in the tank, took an hour plus I am sure, now comes the (real) test.
Screw the void I dont think I even remembered where we were supposed to be going. It was really hard under these circumstances for me to really feel any warm/fuzzies or excitement about, THE VOID. Im not so sure I am interested in getting there now sitting in my living room seems pretty fine for me tonight.
I was kicked, punched, spat on, swore at, shoved, slammed, squished (I KNOW you all have been there but I really want to say this)screamed at, insulted, pinched....lets see anything else??? No one vomited on me but I KNOW it was a clsoe call at least once...
All this as I flowed my way here and there,(like a flower down the stream) went thru every emotion possible (for me)came out of them, and repeatedly surfaced and followed the smell of freah air and got OUTTA there. Only to find myself in a very nice area outdoors near the trees and being continually screamed at in the face, ears, whatever that I was REFUSING TO LIVE LIFE, WEAK, STUPID, you remember possibly?
I would walk a couple feet away from the sreaming and find a nice quiet moment out in the trees, once walking into the trees and being physically turned around and TOLD I was going the wrong way.
So I decided to stand there until it was called, and just BE with myself and breathe. I didnt come to this "school" to learn RIGHT and WRONG. I came to know MY God. Key word here being MY.MY God was not interested in the tank, MY God liked it out in the yard!!!
Some soft womans voice said gentally in my ear you havent moved in a while,(where'd SHE come from??? who trained HER????) move along. I didn't, I just stood there and after a while, who knows how long, the tank was called.
And you know where I was? I found the void, it was right with me all along!!!!!!!!
Really! As I tore off my tape and crap, I almost pucked I was never so happy to get away from a place in my life. YUK.
I spent YEARS in various recovery groups, years ago after 18 months of Incest Survivors Aynonmous, at my last meeting, the one I graduated myself from, I went to attend the group and on my way there a small part of me wanted to stop in Pier One and buy a blanket, it was odd....why on my way to the meeting did SOME part of me want to go buy a blankie??? I IGNORED the pull, drove to the meeting and got out of the car to go in and pucked all over myself. I was not sick and had not been drinking (for over 2 years at that point).
As I stood there the meeting was getting started and and IDEA just came to me outta nowhere!!! I DONE!
I dont want to go in there anymore. Its OVER, I have made it out the other side!!! Of what you ask? WHO CARES!!!!!!!!!!
I suppose every decade (or 2 in my case) I must need to go and roll in crap to see if it still smells the same. It Does!
My 2nd time in the tank, I was feeling bored and suddenly found myself "outside"
****! I gotta get back in there or Im a quitter, and maybe Ram will see me and yell at me, or worse, a human red quard will quide my blind ass back in!
I was scared.
But it was a warm summer day and I heard the birds singing, and all the people in the plastic mess thumping around behind me.
I remembered one my favorite teaching of the Ram, to follow no Guru, etc...so, I asked myself what MY truth was, and it wasnt that I wanted to C&E my way back in the tank.
So I kept the tape on, and walked, WHEREEVER..Over the grass, far, far away from the tank, I just kept walking and feeling so guuuud.
No oNe stopped me. Then I hit the dirt road, and could hear I was passing guards, and none of them stopped me
Hmm, Ram must approve of my course, I thought.
Soon I was at the name field, and i felt my way under the fence, then ripped off the tape. Only kids and handicapped folks were looking for cards.
Mine was on the fence somewhere, a little sun.
I put on the blinders and happily participated, because I was free and I always did love the field.
I found 2 suns in a row, not mine, but Oh Well.
I proved to myself that I can do anything.
I was sick of the tank. I liked freedom.
And I didnt want to challenge myself that way anymore.
I wish that state for everyone who thinks they HAVE to endure any discipline at RSE,[or anywhere in the world!] that they just dont feel like doing
Never let guilt make you do ANYTHING!!!!!
and SO BE THAT!
OH, these posts are so funny ! What we went through, egads. I, too, had found my fill of the tank. I've been in there many, many times, unfortunately. In the first years of the "school" ( I dislike using that word as they don't deserve it). But, anyway, there was extreme pressure to go to the tank. Or to do any discipline. We were told if we didn't do them, we had to leave the event, or leave the school. Is that not coercion?????
Anyway, I also found my void within. I found my way back out of the tank, and just walked the tank field. Nobody bothered me. I, too, had that rush of "freedom" feeling so good inside and I said to myself, "I am focused on being FREE. This IS MY VOID, MY God within me that I am listening to!"
So many disgusting things happened in there over the years. Children with broken bones, adults with broken bones, women who were groped by men, folks going to the bathroom in there (did you wonder what you really crawled through in the worms ?), every emotion you can think of was expressed, being in there for 10 hours in 90 degree heat, cramped with over a thousand people...figure that out...five days in a row...AND WE PAID FOR THIS, HAHAHA...and if this is enlightenment, then perhaps we really ought to be in the moment, and living our HUMAN lives, since we really are acting human. Nobody levitated out of the tank, or bilocated, in 25 years or more.
Then, I think back on, and feel shame for, having been in the tank, climbing ladders and jumping off the other side, during two pregnancies. What the xxxx was I thinking ? In my own defense, I was only 4 - 5 months along each time, but it was that fact - being pregnant - that finally got to me. I said afterward, as the tank was called, "HOLD IT. Follow my voice." and we lay upon the cool grass, exhausted, I told a family member that I am finished. I will never, ever go to the tank again, and if I get kicked out of RSE, so be it. That family member soon quit (graduated) from the school, and I didn't. But, I smartened up later on, and I never did go to the tank ever again.
The people that did make it to the Void, many times, were guided there by staff who were up above. The door that gets one into the area that leads into the void, is controlled by staff. David can tell a story about JZ, from her house, controlling the flow of traffic to the void. It's APPALLING.
Live and learn. Then once you've learned, go home and really LIVE !!! With the ones who really love us, and it sure ain't anyone in RSE, including Ramtha and JZ, who claim they loooove their folkies and students. What bullxxxx.
I doubt they know what it is. That's my opinion.
Yee Gads! I very grateful to know I sure didnt miss anything by only going thru it once. Its REALLY good, for me, to hear other's experiences. I know its all relative to who we are and all that, but we find our truth when and how we find it. Its amazing what we think we need to put ourselves thru to get what we all ready have and have never lost. What a racket.
such grand stories.
As I have decided and seen my exodus from said school, I can only say, for myself, that ALL the magic that happened for me, I, and I repeat, I did it.
I was in the very first tank group ever that had to "qualify" by identifying at least 4 colors with my partner. I was number 59 out of 60 in line , and as we were led out, I heard a staff member mutter, " they will never make it!" Thank god I do not listen to androids.
I made it to the void that time, the next two times, only to be exalted at the end of the event. actually , in my being, I was very very humbled, as something greater than my being had achieved this.
I was glamorized for a bit; and I could not figure that part out, as I was truly humbled.
I made the next 40 or 50 runs without amiss.
I made every void until group ten was formed.
I fretted and fretted as to why.
In retrospect, I found the hidden latch ( as I had heard Lars just go through. One tends to recognize other's breathing patterns) and Ramtha told me: this is not for you at this time. Go find your way to the beginning.
For ten minutes, I trusted. I did so.
The next ten minutes, I was really angry.
Then I got myself back to the beginning, found the showers, and was good to go.
After that, I observed Group ten.
What a bunch of arrogant beeyotches.
Thank GOD I was not a part of that.
I have always enjoyed the elements of the tank.
First: I "surrender"
Second: I focus.
I found , if I do these two things, it is easy as pie.
Thank god for my surrenderability and the trust of a child.
In the end, even though I heard many many staff members get help,I made it "on my own" will , trust , and focus .
I will add, I see much value in everyone's post here. Very nice. Thank you.
I do not know what group ten is. Could you explain ?
Group Ten was formed at the event whereby
all those participants who had "made it to the void" or "accomplished the task"
were in a special group that summer to study privately with Ramtha.
ex: move a beach ball in the arena with their mind.
move a beach ball in the arena with their mind.. intersting...
In the oter group we had to WALK A WOOD PLANK to MASTER it... so we could ASCEND the plank over the pond without falling in the water. It was about staying focused.. and becoming one with the wood plank.
i did walk the plank , withOUT my hands,
and I did ascend a steep tube with a single rope thinking:" how in god's name did Audrey do this?" ( she was a bit in front of me)
I am sure ALL here have had their own personal moments of success in other worldly super-normal events....
These things are truly amazing... and they do teach us and give us an experience that grants proof that we are ALL more that just a human ego living in this world.
I have often thought about creating a group of like minds to gather and PRACTICE the more mystical parts of self... but then again, the moment you do this, we all get very caugh up in th merry-go-round of the opinions and judgements of those who are or are not involved.
It is truly difficult to purly gather in a group these days without someone pointing a finger at you or the group.
Best to just go into your closet and shut the door and live your life.
Your stories are interesting. I have not heard them before. I made it once to the void in the beginning when the tank was very small (most people participating made it I think) and I got near the void in more recent years.
I did hear Ramtha say at one event that there was an underground portion of the Tank and one could PERISH in there.
In the beginning Ramtha said that the Tank was an analogy of life. Lots of people got stuck in the "Country Club".....the part where huge numbers go around the same rooms endlessly and it was an analogy of thinking in the image. Some made it to the "fourth seal" of the Tank and beyond.....meaning they got out of conventional thinking.
Both Audrey and Dr. Joe were reasonably adept at it. Look where it got both of them in life. Adept focus put them into very unpleasant situations in life. Likewise Tree states she was quite proficient at it.
The evidence is observable.
If sustained focus gets you to your goal (void) as indicated in the Tank exercise then where does sustained focus in the reveal all, liquor ceremonies get a person? Rather a discrepancy in the presentation.
So what is the value of the Tank? A sense of achievement that in actual fact has no observable value in daily life.
From RSE's point of view the value of the tank is that it is a fear generator which puts a person into a heightened state of suggestibility. During and afterward, hypnotic suggestions are planted.
All of the disciplines at RSE are geared toward creating a heightened state of suggestibility.
Women have been molested in the tank. In the early years Ramtha stated that women had his permission "to punch the lights out" of anyone who groped them.
I have nver heard of anyone being removed form the tank for doing this.
Never been molested. Never heard of anyone being molesred in the tank. I am not saying that it never happened but it never happened to me and I have never heard anyone mention it before.
I can't say I was ever very good at the tank. I did really enjoy the experience of being blindfolded for long times though. I guess partly because I just really like being alone with myself and not having to worry about how I look or others opinions of how I look etc etc.
I think everyone probably has there own learnings during such challenging experiences. For me the learning was to move past people who I was tempted to feel sorry for. What I learned was that people are stronger than they think they are and sometimes just leaving them alone is the most compassionate thing you can do because it gives them the space to realize this for themselves.
Maybe being catapulted out of school was a result of Audrey, Joe, and Tree's excellent focus on the void. The void does not necessarily have it's co-ordinates in RSE Yelm, WA.
Whereever they go they will be in the void as long as they don't forget what they learned and give their power away to People (JZ, Ramtha, David McCarthy, etc), Places (RSE, Yelm), Things, Times, and Events (Beg, Blue College, Assay etc)
Jackie- I agree... seeking our personal relationship with our God and developing wisdom in privacy and silence is valuable. When we go behind closed doors, no one watching, we are doing it for ourselves, for the pure joy of our personal experience with our God.
I agree DecernmentNow. As long as you don't fall asleep in the closet. :-)