Thanks for joining in the conversation!
DLM shouts again at Reg, from down the bus.
DLM: Hey! Brass buttoned, blue blazer, British boy ... is there a john on this bus, or what?
Reg consults his list again.
Reg: Er, not yet DLM. But I'm expecting one at any minute.
A group of three prime, US males approaches the steps. This is what is meant by 'beefcake'. Frankly, they may as well be Brad Pitt, George Clooney and Sylvester Stallone, for all the difference it would make. In fact, however, they are John Kenney, Dave Mayberry and Victor.
Reg: Welcome aboard guys. Glad you could make it.
John: Going well so far, Reg?
Reg: Well, let's say it's having its moments. Cough.
Dave: Bet you're wishing you hadn't started it now!
Reg: Well, the thought had crossed my mind.
Victor: Keep going dude. We're all rooting for ya!
Reg: Thanks guys. Find your seats. We'll be moving off soon.
And they are followed by another hunky threesome. Who is this? Could it be Bruce Willis, Steven Seagal and Arnold Schwarzt ... Shcwartz ... er, Arnie? No. But who needs them when you've got Jeremy Jackson, Stan and Glenn?
Reg: Hi guys! You'll find your seats down on the left, there. You see where DLM has planted that small Stars and Stripes into the back of the headrest of the seat in front? That's the area for 'Mercan males. And I fine place to be, it is too.
Another man breathlessly races up the steps.
BS: Phew! Glad to be finally on board, Reg.
Reg does not recognise this particular ... er, dude.
Reg: And this is ...?
BS: Why, this is me. BS. You wanna guess what my initials stand for?
Reg: I'd rather not. This is a family website. But you'll find your fellow countrymen down there on the left. Y'all be having a good time, now!
BS gives Reg a strange look - and then goes to join the guys.
'Nearly done', thinks Reg, 'nearly done'. And the last few passengers approach the bus. Reg looks out. In the group he spots the two remaining ladies. 'But which is Lynn and which is Toni?' he can't help but wonder.
Jolly good show, Sapinald Regworthy! Just wanted to remind you that I got off the bus briefly yesterday, owing to my temporary discomfort at finding myself in someone else's skin and demeanor entirely, and thus am still standing outside next to Toni (my seatmate) and Lynn (my OTHER seatmate-- hopefully somehow the three of us can play a sort of "Musical Chairs" and take turns sitting next to each other). If I may be so bold as to offer you a few clues, I'm wearing comfortable navy blue leggings, funky blue and orange Adidas trainers (na ja, "die Marke mit den drei Riemen"!), and a white T-shirt emblazoned with the old blue 1930s trademark Nancy Drew with magnifying-glass silhoutte on the front. I've also got on a silver pendant of a moon goddess, another of a pentagram twined with an oak leaf and twig design, a strand of rainbow-colored peace beads, and several silver rings, one of which is a wolf's head, like one of those in my dad's English family crest, and another of which is set with Danish amber. I'm wearing no make-up, as I prefer the natural look, except when I'm being Cleopatra at a costume party! My blonde hair is mixed with just a wee bit of silver, worn long and loose. There's a mischievous twinkle in my big green eyes, and a Mona Lisa smile on my lips. It's a brand new day, and anything can happen! And probably will, ha very ha. ;-)
Well I made the bus..phew...long trip from Maine..there's a saying up there.."nope you can't get there from here"...but dam*..I forgot my "papers"...Toni?...got any hanging around..?
What "fellow countrymen" would that be Reg?
Hey, Robin! Care to join Lynn and Toni and me in our magical hystery game of "Musical Chairs"? :-) And I just remembered Freddy also wants to sit next to Toni. Heck (to quote our valiant queen), maybe we should ALL take turns sitting next to each other?? If our intrepid tour guide and host will allow, that is. I wouldn't mind sitting next to Wagstaff some of the time! I'm sure he and I'd get around to plotting the Overthrow of the Known Universe SOONER or later! Heh hee hoo-boy! How 'bout it, noble travel compagnons? :-)
Reg, should the bus become a little crowded - I'll volunteer to drive considering I've spent a good portion of my life in the bus business.
Hi Laurie, I would be simply delighted! Thank you.
Just so you all know, witty repartee is not my strong suit. I am uninhibited in cyberspace, but in person, I am actually a quiet little mouse, until I feel comfortable, and then... I need my friends to kick me under the table sometimes when I forget I am in public.
You'd better enlighten me. I assumed you were American. Wrong?
Hi Reg. Thanks so much for letting me on the bus at the last minute. Oh, and although Hawaii has become almost my second home over the last few years, I was born and bred and still reside in the lovely state of California.
I had no idea this would be so much fun!
Quite flattering that you could mistake me for an American, considering I'm Scandinavian!
Wonderful, Robin! :-) We should have plenty to catch up about, since we sort of accidentally lost touch for awhile... ;-)
Wow, BS, I guess I thought you were American too! Your "English" is very good, typical of every Scandinavian I've ever known! Which country are you from?
Oh, it all makes sense now. That's obviously why you gave me a strange look when I was checking you onto the bus. Don't worry - I've made some adjustments and I think you'll like where I'll be putting you.
Quick thinking, Regmeister! LOL...
Hey reg
Gotta a messsage from graeme via the Swiss Embassy in Edinburgh...
He will be here soon with his back pack full
Of whisky and his four kids....
Oh, To-o-o-ni! Since Reg doesn't seem to have a clue what you look like (not that he had a clue what *I* look like, either, which didn't stop him gothifying me within an inch of my life, ahem), surely you must have an old photo of yourself you could post in one of Stevie Nicks' cast-off glad-rags you mentioned yesterday? I mean, "previously owned"... ;-)
Nah, I think it will be much more fun to find out what he thinks I look like...although being Reg, I'm sure he knows there is one old photo of me floating around on the web somewhere - at least there once was.
Was just wondering how many more seats are left Reg. Would be interesting to see how you think I would be dressed, or even if I'm expected on the tour.
Reg's on a hysterycal break
Tee very ho ho ho, Jeremy!! Good fractured pun the other day to Robin about the "mistery" tour, too ! ;-)
